Why Today Feels Like Deja Vu…

dejs

So you woke up this morning feeling like you’ve been in this exact place before.  Different day, but the same problems…  Life appears to be repeating itself, you’re fed up, and the challenges you’re faced with has gotten the best of you.   Weighed down, weak, stressed to the max, tired of being tired, frustrated, and ready to throw in the towel, so now you find yourself asking “Lord, why is this happening to me AGAIN?”   I’ve heard many times throughout my life, “God will repeatedly test you until you finally pass the test”.  This tends to be said when life appears to be at its worst…  So many times we automatically assume God Is testing our faith, character, and our love for Him.   Today, I want to challenge you to look at it differently … Not to look at it as a “test”, but a “prep course” or a “life applicable” moment.

Did you know every struggle we face is not a test?  Every opposition we come up against is not a test?  Every low moment we endure is not a test?  God’s purpose is not always to test our strength, but reveal our strength…  Because He knows what’s ahead, He sometimes uses moments in which we feel are unbearable to prepare; equip; anoint and appoint us for future moments in our lives.   God uses these things not only to build our character (Click “HERE” to read more)

CD Review: Lenny Kravitz

 lenny

I’ve never been a huge fan of Lenny Kravitz, but I do like many of his singles that he’s released over the years (“Fly Away”, “Come Get It” and “Are You Gonna Go My Way? “). In fact, I don’t own any of his albums. But after I heard “The Chamber” (a song where he recounts giving his heart to a cold blooded lover who took him for granted) and a few other songs from his new album, Strut, I decided to take a gamble and check it out.Strut is an album that many hard core fans have been eagerly anticipating. The music video for “The Chamber” is very the theatrical and looks like a seductive scene from a movie. Lenny Kravitz wrote and produced all of the songs on the album and actually has created a very enjoyable sound.

There are no featured artists throughout the entire album, unless you count Woody Harrelson’s contribution to hand claps on “I’m A Believer” as an appearance. Strutopens with the infectious and calmly demanding “Sex”. He sings, “Hold me/Love me/Call my name/ I just want you to feel me/Breathe me”. This song has a throwback appeal with loud guitars that make it a great way to kick off the album. “Dirty White Boots” on the other hand is a bit more gut bucket and finds Lenny Kravits screaming, “You know you turn me in/In your dirty white boots”. Hey, everybody’s got their thing and I guess dirty white boots are a fantasy of his. Either way, this is another fun, high energy track on the album.

“New York City”, which he just shot a music video for, is a tribute to his beloved city that’s part blues and part soft rock. His voice is smoother, although still loud here, and less gritty than some of the other tracks (Click “Lenny CD Review” to read more)

Residue

Fall Residue Management

Truth:  What’s ahead is better than what is behind…  Keep moving forward…

With any storm, be it Hail, Tornado, Hurricane, Flooding, or Fire, some form of damage is left behind to remind us of what has happened.  Roofs are torn, cars dented, floors flooded, and many are left homeless due to the loss of what they worked years to build.

Life after a storm for some is very difficult.  The memories of what once was have crippled them, and now they struggle with walking into a better future for themselves.  Just like the afterlife of a natural storm, many people are currently living in a world filled with residue.  They’ve come out of the storm, yet the damage has left their minds shaken, hearts broken, and spirits crushed from the wear and tear.

Crippled and afflicted,  they’ve taken resident in the residue we know as brokenness.  The memories of the bad relationship, job, childhood abuse has become a tumor in their minds leaving them paralyzed.  God has delivered, healed, and restored them, but because their minds are filled with afflicting thoughts, they can’t receive the healing.  Thoughts of unworthiness, undeserving, and self depreciating words are cataracts of the spirit.

What I know for sure is… Residue is left behind for us to see we’re out of the storm.  It should serve as a reminder   (Click “Residue” to read more)

Are You A Stingy Sipper?

stingy

If you’ve ever been to a wine tasting, then you know it can be quite an exciting experience. Basically, you have the chance to taste many different red and white wines that may be sweet, spicy, bland or crisp. But you have to drink (or I guess pour out if you don’t like it) each sample before you can move on to the next. Some of us still haven’t grasped this wine tasting concept when it comes to our everyday lives. Are you sitting at the table demanding for someone to pour you a glass of love, trust, money or success, while never emptying from it? Contrary to popular belief, those who give really experience the spice of life. They have the opportunity to taste (and receive) the best life has to offer.

 

Have you ever met someone that only wants to receive and never wants to give anything? Everything is about their hurt, their interests, their faults and their accomplishments. Geeshhh….I’m getting a headache just thinking about it. Many times we may think we’re savoring the best (Click “Sipper” to read more)

How To Gain A Woman’s Interest In 30 Seconds…

womanat3

 

Okay, it’s Friday and I thought I would write something lite and easy….

So here we go…

Men, here are 7 “MUST HAVES” to gain a woman’s attention in 30 seconds…

Confidence:  If you lack confidence, you can hang it up, at least if you’re looking for a “good” woman…  When walking into the room, OWN IT…  A woman can spot a weak man by his walk, stance, and the way in which he carries himself…   If you’re out with your buddies, don’t compete with them, this only shows weakness.  Manhood is not a completion, nor a race…  If you want the trophy (woman), be the strong hunter you are, and you’ll take home the prize at the end of the night (Sometimes literally).

Eye Contact:  Let her know you’re interested without being creepy…  Attraction is two-sided, so let her know you have your eye on her.  If she’s interested, she’s going to return the favor… Our eyes tell a story before we even open our mouth…  Real Talk:  If you can’t look directly into a woman’s eyes, an instant red flag goes up.  Also, if you’re wearing sunglasses at night or in a club, not only does it say you’re immature, but lack confidence and common sense…

Appearance: Hugo Boss, Prada, Ted Baker are all wonderful designers, but not needed to catch a woman.  Men, if you want to catch her, keep it simple.  Some of you were born with an eye for what works, but there are those of you needing a little help.  If you’re one who needs help, here’s a great tip:  In a recent poll it was revealed women love men in a V-Neck T-Shirt and Jeans… BUTTTTT, the shirt must be crisp, clean, no sweat stains under the arm pits, no rips created over time, AND your shoes MUST be nice…  If you can’t afford to have them professionally shined and polished, take a little time before stepping out and do it yourself…  Your shoes tell more about you than your resume…

Well Groom:  Manicure, pedicure, haircut, shaved (Click “Woman’s Interest” to read more)

Why “Time To Heal” Is Needed After A Relationship

Mary J. Blige

I’m so excited about today’s song because I believe the lyrics speak to where a lot of you are today…  Mary J. is back and if the song I’ve chosen is an indication of the entire CD, I predict multiple Grammy’s for her.  I’ve never purchased or been a huge Mary J. fan, but she has just won me over…  Check our Peauxetic Expressions review; click “Mary J. Review”

Today, I want to break down the lyrics to “Whole Damn Year”.  This song speaks to those of you who may have just come out of what can be considered a “Bad Relationship”.  Throughout the song, Mary J. sings about how it took a whole year to repair her body (life), trust again, and allow someone else into her heart.  The standout stanza is actually at the very beginning of the song

That’s how deep the pain is

Oh you just couldn’t believe

And yes it seems good on the surface

But I’m a mess underneath

Winter took most of my heart

Spring punched me right in the stomach

Summer came looking for blood

And by autumn I was left with nothing

It took a whole damn year to repair my body, it’s been a bad five years

Gonna take a long year for me to trust somebody

Gonna take a long year for me to touch somebody, it’s been a bad five years

 

All I can say is, WOW….  One of the biggest mistakes we sometimes make when coming out of a relationship is not taking time to heal.  Whether it was a “good” or “bad” relationship, time is needed to analyze, examine, focus and repair ourselves.  It has been said the easiest way to get over someone is to find someone new…  As a result of this type of thinking,  there are so many hurt and broken people on the dating scene.  Never allowing the proper and much needed time to heal left them with a scabbed (façade, games, etc.) covered wound (heart) – (Yes it seems good on the surface, but I’m a mess underneath).

Time, whether it’s a month, year, or 2 – 5 years should be taken after coming out of a relationship.  Side Note:  Just because the relationship you just left could be perceived as a “good” relationship, time is still needed to examine.  If you’re not in it any longer, something was wrong.  Was it you?  Him/her? Whatever the cause of the breakup, take time to examine the situation to avoid it in the future.

So let’s talk about “bad relationship’s”… Now I’ve been in a few of these before and I must tell you, these lyrics describe it perfectly….  While “in” or “coming out” of a bad relationship, you go through seasons of emotions… One minute you’re hurt, the next angry, the next an emotional wreck, the next moment you feel it hurt so bad you’ve been punched not only in the stomach, but the face as well…  After you’ve been a passenger on this emotional roller coaster for months or possibly years, you finally reach the place of “Emotional Depletion” (autumn).  You’re numb to love, happiness, and joy…  You’re emotionally drained and putting up a fight seems impossible, you have nothing.

So why is “time” crucial?  Well because if it’s a bad relationship you’re coming out of, YOU’RE DAMAGED GOODS…   If it’s a “good” relationship you’re coming out of, there’s a possibility as well, YOU’RE DAMAGED GOODS…  Allowing yourself time to heal only benefits you in the future…   Jumping into a new relationship doesn’t fix the problem; it only delays the healing process and occupies your mind.  The danger of a rebound is you invite a completely innocent person into your mess.  Because you haven’t healed, you’re (Click “Time” to read more)

Why “Perfect Mate List” Narrows Your Chances…

lovecouple

 

Over the weekend I was asked, “John, do you have a “Want List” and if so, what’s on it?”  Now for those of you who are unaware of what’s a “Want List”.   It’s a list that outlines characteristics you require or want in a mate.  I can remember in the past having this list of specifications, requirements, and needs…  My list was so detailed and specific, I didn’t know if I was looking to “date” or “purchase” a car…

I knew the height, size, length of hair; career or field in which I thought complimented mine, etc…  When I tell you my list didn’t exclude anything, IT DIDN’T.  I knew exactly what I wanted, but was my list realistic? Was I asking for too much?  Was there ONE PERSON who met every requirement on my list? So when asked if I have a “want list”, my answer was “NO, I have a “Don’t Want” List”….

As I get older I realize there is no such thing as a “Perfect Mate” and if I find this person, will I be their “Perfect Mate”….  Will I possess all their wants, needs, and meet every requirement?  Probably NOT…   By having this “Perfect Mate” or “Want List” I limited myself, but changing the list from “Want” to “Don’t Want”, I opened my dating world up to multiple chances of finding love.

So you may be wondering what’s a “Don’t Want” list, huh?   Well this list includes the things you’re not willing to welcome into your life… You know like drama, confusion, mental or physical abuse, poverty, obesity, someone who’s not supportive, etc.  This (Click “Perfect Mate” to read more)

WTHW: Tri Cup Foolery

cup

 

For many people, the dating scene is extremely hard these days. There are more people than a little bit who are posing fake identities, have tempers shorter than a lit stick of dynamite, and more issues to carry than an airport baggage claim. There are some that love the thrill of the chase in finding that one needle in a hay stack that makes it all worthwhile. Then, there are others who simply can’t deal and go to drastic measures to turn the tables in their favor. That’s exactly what 21 year old Jasmine Tridevil did….by adding a 3rd breast to her body. WTH?!

Yes, Jasmine got so tired of the dating scene (at 21 years of age…really?), that she decided to surgically add a third breast smack dab in the middle of her preexisting natural ones. And what exactly did she think this would do? Lure men away from her. The pricey surgery cost her $20,000 and needless (Click “Tri Cup” To Read More )

Stop Eating, You’re Getting Fat!!!

hambur

 

I’m always blown away by YouTube videos that lack substance, degrade women, injects toxin into the minds of people, racial profiling, and all other videos adding NO value whatsoever to the lives of people, yet they have millions of views…   We see them posted all over Social Media, News Broadcast, Newspapers and other forms of mass media…  People share and repeatedly watch them over and over again…

The world we live in today is driven by “Drama”…  Sadly to say, we thrive on it; our minds crave it and if it’s something positive, we’re really not interested in it…  Some of you reading this post today, your life is a complete and uttered mess…  You eat “drama” for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and the two snacks in between.  You’re being fed it on the radio as you’re driving into work, through gossip once arriving at work and when making it home, there’s a serving of it waiting for you there.  You’re mentally obese and you can’t understand why your life is suffering and crumbling right before your eyes…

Did you know what we take in has a great impact on our lives?  You know like having negative friends impact our lives negatively?   Constantly feeding our minds negative images impact our lives (Click here to read more “Fat” )