Roses Really Smells Like Boo Boo…

 

Would you agree to an open relationship?  A relationship where your mate can freely date and sleep with someone other than yourself?  Yeah I already know your answer, HELL NAW, right???  If he/she can’t only be with you, then you want nothing to do with them, right???  But this is what you say before the emotional connection, good sex, cohabitation, and the wedding vows…  This is what many of you say before the lifestyle you’ve grown accustomed to; before the fear of starting over kicked in…  It’s funny how the very thing we say we would never do, many of us find ourselves doing it…

Some of you today are in an “open relationship”…  You haven’t officially acknowledged this, but you’re with someone who you’re aware is entertaining, sleeping with, and emotionally connected to someone else…  No judgment here, just keeping it 100….  You’re currently in a situation you know damn well isn’t going anywhere.  You don’t trust them and they know it, but they also know you’re not going anywhere.  You’ve weighed out your options and you’ve convinced yourself into believing “Being with someone is better than being alone”, “Everyone has faults, no one is perfect”, “I can’t make it on my own”…  Or how about “He’s just being a man”????  You know that ish you tell (Click HERE to read more)

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Pieces Of “The Perfect One”…

 

So yesterday I was chatting with a buddy of mine and he shared some things going on in his life…  Outside of the normal hustle and bustle, I thought this guy had somewhat of a normal life, but boy was I surprised…  He has an amazing job, he’s super intelligent; has a wife, kiddos, and a girlfriend…  YUP, A GIRLFRIEND…  Now he caught me off guard with this one, but hey no judgment here…  As we continued to talk and he continued to share his journey, he said something that really stuck with me…  “One person can never be your everything, so why make them your only?” Now whether or not I completely agree with this is irrelevant, that’s his truth and I appreciate the fact he’s found and living it…  He believes what his wife lacks, his girlfriend packs…  For him, he’s taking the best of them to make the person woman in his life…  It’s almost like a puzzle, he’s combining pieces to make the masterpiece…

As ludicrous as this may sound, I believe the reason this stuck with me is because there is some truth to it… So let me ask those of you who are either married or currently in a relationship…  Does the one you’re with check off everything on your list???  Be honest with yourself… Is there anything you would tweak about him/her??? Anything you want him/her to possess that they don’t???  Well I know there are some of you who believe your mate has everything you want, but does he/she view you the same???  PROBABLY NOT!!!!  No matter (Click HERE to read more)

You Ain’t Tired Yet…

 

People always ask me, “John, when do I know?”  and my response is, “You’ll know when you’re tired of it”… 

One of my biggest mistakes in my past is NOT enjoying where I was at that particular moment… Just like many of you I’ve been in relationships, worked jobs, attended churches and have been a part of some pretty crappy stuff…  The entire time I was a part of it, just like many of you, I complained about it…  I complained about not being happy, nothing going in the direction I wanted, and about how things could be so much better…   I knew I should have walked away, but I stayed and not only did I stay, I constantly reminded myself just how miserable I was…  You see, I should have made the best of the situation seeing that I wasn’t going anywhere…  I should have found the light at the end of the tunnel, saw the glass as half full opposed to half empty, but just like many of you reading, I allowed myself to drown in a pool of unhappiness in which I was filling myself… 

Looking back in hindsight, I now see I was responsible for my unhappiness…  Yeah I’m the one to blame for staying in situations that added no value to my life…  I could have easily walked away, but there were things that (Click HERE to read more)

“Love” Works That Way…

 

 

Whether you’re male/female, black/white, gay/straight or skinny/fat, at the core of you is the desire to be truly accepted for who you are and to be loved regardless of who you are… “Love” is something many of you are clueless to how it feels, therefore you find yourselves in situations in which “love” hurts horribly…  I’ve been in love…  I’ve been in what I thought was love…  And I’ve also dealt with situations in which there was no love…  “Love” is something we all want, but if love makes #bae lie, cheat, hit or kill, don’t love me just leave me the hell alone… 

Today I want to share with you 4 things I’ll be damn I allow love to bring into my life…

If love makes you “lie”, don’t love me, just leave me the hell alone…  What I know for sure is…  “Love” may not keep someone from lying to you, but it will keep them from holding onto the lie…  It’s something about lying to the person in which you love that makes your conscious uneasy…  Initially the other person may believe you and move on, but because of your own guilt, you just can’t live with the lie.  When you lie, your conscious eats away at you because of the love for that person…  You may have lied, but eventually you will come forth with the truth…  “Love” works that way…

If love makes you “cheat”, don’t love me, just leave me the hell alone…  What I know for sure is…  “Love” may not keep someone from looking at booty, tits, and even wondering what it would feel like to get all up in that, but it will keep them from going through with it…  It’s something about cheating on the person in which you love that makes your conscious uneasy…  Initially (Click HERE to read more)

The “Double Standards” Of Women…

 

Fellas, do you sometimes feel women have double standards?  They’re able to get away with a lot more because they’re women?  Do you ever feel women have greater expectations and have set higher standards for men to follow than themselves?  Well this post is for you…

Here are 6 areas in which SOME or MOST women have DOUBLE STANDARDS

Lies:

When a man tells a lie, according to a woman he’s trying to protect himself and cover up his dirt…  When a woman tells a lie, according to her, she’s trying to protect his ego, avoid shattering his pride, and keeping from him feeling as though he’s not a man….

Cheating:

When a man cheats, according to a woman it’s because he’s unable to keep his Johnson in his pants…  He’s a whore, dog, and lack the gene to commit to one woman…  When a woman cheats, according to her, it’s because he is emotionally unavailable; the other man made her feel beautiful, needed, and desired…  She’s not a whore or a slut, she’s a woman with emotional needs her man was unwilling to provide…

Jobless:

When a man is unemployed for an extended period of time, according to a woman it’s because he’s not looking hard enough.  He’s lazy, immature, a user, (Click HERE to read more)

People Can Change…

 

So it’s 2:33 a.m. this morning and my phone rings…  Without looking I answered and man was I surprised…  The voice was familiar, but one I haven’t heard in years… After a long moment of silence I sit up, look at my phone to confirm who I thought it was, and respond “Yeah I’m here”…  Let’s fast forward to about twenty minutes into the conversation…

John, I’m truly sorry for anything I’ve done to cause you any hurt or pain.  You were nothing but good to me and didn’t deserve how I treated you.  A lot has changed since we were together including me.  I wanted to know if your heart was big enough to forgive me and give us a second chance…

As I listened, I smiled…  I smiled not because time has revealed what was loss, but because time has revealed what was gained…  In the six years I’ve been single, I’ve gained so much… I’ve gained a peace that many people can’t understand…  I’ve gained the power of forgiveness, self-love, and the power of knowing exactly who I am and what I deserve…  I’ve gained the comfort of knowing being single isn’t the end of the world and gained the truth a relationship can’t complete me, but should complement me…  I’ve gained so much from moving forward, so much that I’m unwilling to lose it going backwards…

People can change…  People can realize the errors of their ways and become someone new…  Some (Click HERE to read more)

You Make Marriage Look Bad…

 

Honestly, some people make marriage look so undesirable…  They don’t wear it well, nor do they even attempt to… I mean when did “breaks” become a part of being married???  Yeah breaks???  You know like “I need a break from you, so I’m moving out”; “I need a break to see if this is what I truly want”; “I need a break to work on me”???  WTH?????  BREAK???  It wouldn’t be no “breaks” here, but let me digress because this blog has nothing to do with me…

 Some of you would be surprised if you knew the real deal of the marriages you want… You know that marriage that seems so perfect on the surface, but truly drowning… Drowning in lies, financial problems, drama, lack of sex OR the desire for too much sex, lack of trust and drowning in the facades they’ve perfected to make you envy their lives… If only you knew how many of them were taking “breaks”, well actually some of you do know because they’re “breaking” with you… Yep, I said it… Some of you reading today are involved with a (Click HERE to read more)