Expectations…

 

Most people know I’m a “Jeans and T” kind of guy…  As much as I love fashion and even love how I look when I get all dressed up, if I could throw on a pair of jeans, a T-Shirt and a pair of Converse, I would be in hog heaven…  Here recently I was promoted at work…  The position is more demanding, requires me to be in multiple meetings a week, and it is one that is more visible to people who aren’t in our department…  Just this morning I began to notice how in some regards I’ve stepped up my appearance…  Not that I look bad before, but I’m taking somewhat more time in the morning thinking through what I’m going to wear…  Everyone around has remained the same, but I’ve changed…

Being honest with not only myself, but you…  Subconsciously I convinced myself into believing this is what is either required or expected of me… I convinced myself that I’m expected to wear slacks, either a polo or button down shirt and some days, even a blazer or sports coat…  No one told me this, it’s just an added pressure I believe I’ve placed on myself…  I’m the only overdressed guy on the team every day… Now don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with dressing up, but if it goes against the core of who you are, then there may be an issue there… As stated earlier, I’m a jeans guy… I’m laid back and I work in a laid back environment, but as soon as I received the promotion, I changed to fit in to a perception of what I thought I should be…

Now where am I going with this you’re wondering…  Well many of you have changed because of the expectations you believe has been placed on you.  It’s funny how when we get into relationships, we feel as though we can’t do the things we did when we were single, so we deprive ourselves…  How when we accept Jesus as our personal Lord and Savior, we feel we can no longer go to places we enjoyed, so we stop and later secretly resent ever committing to Christ because we feel we’re missing out on life…  How about when people get married, they believe it’s a requirement or expectation they can no longer deal with their single friends, so they cut them off (Click HERE to read more)

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People Can Change…

 

So it’s 2:33 a.m. this morning and my phone rings…  Without looking I answered and man was I surprised…  The voice was familiar, but one I haven’t heard in years… After a long moment of silence I sit up, look at my phone to confirm who I thought it was, and respond “Yeah I’m here”…  Let’s fast forward to about twenty minutes into the conversation…

John, I’m truly sorry for anything I’ve done to cause you any hurt or pain.  You were nothing but good to me and didn’t deserve how I treated you.  A lot has changed since we were together including me.  I wanted to know if your heart was big enough to forgive me and give us a second chance…

As I listened, I smiled…  I smiled not because time has revealed what was loss, but because time has revealed what was gained…  In the six years I’ve been single, I’ve gained so much… I’ve gained a peace that many people can’t understand…  I’ve gained the power of forgiveness, self-love, and the power of knowing exactly who I am and what I deserve…  I’ve gained the comfort of knowing being single isn’t the end of the world and gained the truth a relationship can’t complete me, but should complement me…  I’ve gained so much from moving forward, so much that I’m unwilling to lose it going backwards…

People can change…  People can realize the errors of their ways and become someone new…  Some (Click HERE to read more)

It’s Just A Text…

 

So I have this buddy who today finds himself in a very difficult situation…  Long story short…  A few years ago there were a few text messages sent to another woman; wifey found out about it and still to this day, he’s paying for it…  Now to him, it was just a text message…  He didn’t sleep with her, so what’s the big deal he asks…  Per our conversation there were no inappropriate pictures or “I love you” found in the text messages, however the tone could be interpreted as inappropriate….  Now he swears nothing sexual ever transpired; there were no dates or secret meetings, but his wife still finds it hard to move on from…  He’s struggling with why she’s making it such a big deal when in his eyes, he did nothing wrong…

Now before you go off on my bud, wifey isn’t innocent herself…  In the past she’s done her share of dirt, made a few mistakes and she’s even put doubt in his mind regarding where he stands within her life…  You know how you women do…  “I can go find me another man”, “I’ve had better”, (Click HERE to read more)

You’re Supposed To Be Married…

 

Can someone please tell me where it’s written the age of a person dictates their marital status???  By a certain age you should be married with kids and living in the big house with the white picket fence???  Do you know where I can find this???  Well if you don’t, why are you living your life according to it???

Many of you reading this post are depressed all because you aren’t married…  You thought by now you would be married with kids and living what you call a dream…  You thought you’d be building a brighter future with the man/woman you’ve dreamed of your entire life, but this isn’t the case…  You’re single and with each passing day you’re getting older, feeling less marketable/desirable, and you’re beginning to lose hope…  Hope of having children…  Hope of having someone to grow old with…  Hope of ever finding or being found by the one you’re destined to be with…  You were supposed to be married by now, but guess what, YOU’RE NOT…

Some of you have been married, but it failed… You married someone maybe because (Click HERE to read more)

Show Interest, Don’t Chase…

What I’ve chosen to write about today, many of you struggle in this area… You go on a date, enjoy the encounter, but someway somehow you screw things up… The date ended well and you left with hopes of her/him contacting you soon, but as time passes without hearing from them, you begin to panic…. You struggle with the thought of texting or calling, or if whether or not you should allow him/her to make the first move… After much back and forth, you decide to take the plunge and send a text… Anxiously awaiting a response, you become impatient and when he/she finally responds, you over analyze it…  You sent “Good Morning”, they replied “Good Morning”, but that wasn’t enough for you…  You wanted “Good Morning, how are you?  Enjoyed last night, thanks for an amazing time…” to validate your existence and the impact in which you had on their life… 

So let me get to my point…  As written in “How to Win the Dating Game” (Get your copy by clicking HERE), the biggest game both men and women play when dating is “The Waiting Game”…  We’ve all played it, so no judgement here, but playing this game only proves you are a loser…  Some (Click HERE to read more)

Women Are Abusers Too…

 

Sadly to say, there are some women who aren’t satisfied unless there’s an argument, drama, confusion, or unless their man is all bent out of shape…  “Drama” has become their permanent address, the place in which they mentally reside and when a sign of “peace” is on the arisen, they do something to screw it up…   These women are incapable of being content with happiness and peace, therefore they push buttons to bring madness into their lives…

So maybe you remember my post “He Didn’t Make You Insecure, You Did” from a few weeks ago….  The same guy I mentioned in that post struck up a conversation with me again this morning…  New toilet, but the same ole shit….  So long story short…  The week I posted the blog she punched him in the face that weekend, the cops came and arrested her, they’re no living together and of course, today she’s sorry and wanting him to forgive her…  So where am I going with this??? Well brothers, if you’re with a woman who is not treating you well or has the audacity to slap or punch you, LEAVE HER… No argument, action or words warrant anyone putting their hands on another person…

Now sadly to say, some of you women reading are currently hitting your man…  You’re what I like to call a “Button Pusher”…  You’re testing (Click HERE to read more)